Growing up in a small Midwest town in the 1950s, I had the usual expectations of young girls of that era of being either a teacher or a nurse – I eventually did both – then getting married and having children. That was the life I thought I had signed up for.
That isn’t what I got. What I got was a wonderful, godly husband who already had two children, one of whom lived with us and was bipolar, a diagnosis that did not happen until we had been married for a number of years.
Have you ever been angry with God? I have. My expectations of having a normal life were shattered. But then again, what is God’s idea of a normal life?
It is Christ living in me, His Spirit infusing and empowering everything I do. A normal life for a Christian has nothing to do with circumstances. It has everything to do with Christ being evident in my life no matter what is going on.
I’ll admit that I haven’t always done well in this area. In fact, in the early days of my “not-so-normal” life, I often responded with anger, cynicism, judgmental attitudes. Even my prayers about the situation were not prayers of blessing but rather like those of the disciples who asked if God was going to rain down judgment on the town that rejected them.
One of the first lessons I learned was that I was not the Holy Spirit. Seems obvious, doesn’t it? And yet I tried to correct and rebuke in my attitude, if not in my words.
Just that one thing has brought rest into my spirit when I get anxious and discouraged. God knows what He is doing, and I need to give Him room to work instead of getting in the way with my own plans as to how I think He should do it.
God sees everything all at once, a vantage point that I will never have. He is in a much better position to work things out.
So I’ll just let God be God, and rest in the knowledge that His ways are perfect, no matter what they look like to me.